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Find love: Michelle & J.’s Love Story


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I’ve got another love story to share with you today. Michelle is a young professional who lives in Seattle and she sent me this email a few weeks ago about how she found love:

“I just wanted to write and thank you for sharing Soulmate School. I took your course at the end of last year, and I have a success story!! I can’t believe I’m a success story!! Lol. 

I met my sweetie during week 4 of Soulmate School, and he’s amazing. He’s everything I asked for on my “list”. We’ve been officially together since early February, and things are going great for us.”

I love hearing about the slow pace of Michelle and J.’s love story. And, as I’ve seen with other love stories, she wasn’t initially sure that she was attracted to him and now knows that he’s amazing.

Once again proving that if you have a few dates with a good man – don’t give up just because there’s not an initial spark. It’s something that can open up as you spend more time together. Here’s Michelle’s story…

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I ended my last relationship about 3 and a half years ago. And even though I was the one who’d broken up with him, I couldn’t seem to let go. He started dating someone else really quickly and that felt so hurtful to me. Plus he lived close by, and was always on my mind.

I was meeting a lot of new guys and going on dates but nothing was clicking. I thought I was ready to move on, but really I wasn’t.

I had known about Soulmate School for awhile, but I thought I didn’t need it (laughs). I thought I could just do more online dating and “the one” would show up. But it just wasn’t happening. Then I saw your free call on Making Space for Love and clearing out your ex and I thought “that’s exactly what I need. I need to let my ex go.” It was such a helpful call.

I realized that nothing would change unless I changed, and I really connected with your energy Liesel, so I enrolled in Soulmate School.

During a group coaching call, I said, “I’m so skeptical of meeting guys online” and you said to me, “Then don’t do it, there’s lots of other ways to meet men.” Somehow you saying that gave me permission to not be so attached.

I let the pressure go and felt an opening in my heart. I was feeling really connected to myself and I started feeling way more open to online dating than before. So I decided to keep my e-harmony account.

In the 4th week of Soulmate School, I got a message from J. (he’s a private guy so just using his initial :-). I knew exactly who he was, and I was really excited! I’d looked at his profile so many times, but I hadn’t been able to bring myself contact him. And here he was, not knowing that, and reaching out to me!

We communicated back and forth over email, and he asked if I wanted to meet for coffee. Before the date I used all the energetic tools I’d learned in Soulmate School so I went in feeling confident. Initially, he was pretty shy and reserved. I didn’t feel an immediate connection, but I thought maybe we can be friends. We were enjoying ourselves, so we walked over to another spot for dinner.

During dinner he opened up more and seemed more comfortable. And then he asked me the most brilliant question I’ve ever been asked on a first date. He said “Honesty is the best policy, so what do you think about me?” And it gave me permission to be completely honest.

I said, “I feel like there’s so much pressure with online dating and that I don’t know if I could give you an answer yet. I want to get to know you more, maybe just as a friend, and see if anything develops from there.” And then I asked him “What about you?” and he said “I’d be really interested in seeing you again.”

A week later he called me and asked me to dinner at a great restaurant. I went just as friends, not as a date, which was so great, because all of my  barriers were dropped and I wasn’t nervous. I was completely myself and wasn’t worried about how I was acting or what he’d think of me. By end of dinner realized I was having fun and started thinking “I wish this was a date.”

So the next day I texted him “I had fun last night :)” He immediately responded “I had fun too” and then “I’ll call you early in the week.”

We went on another date and I asked him when his birthday was and he said “tomorrow”. He had just moved to Seattle from Illinois and didn’t know many people, so we made a plan to celebrate his birthday together.

At his birthday dinner everything shifted for me.  

We were talking about hiking and traveling. Both of which I love. And then he said “I really enjoy wandering and getting lost and exploring neighborhoods” and I totally love to do that! I always wanted that with a past partner and never had it.  And to top it all off, he shared that his friends had sent him a box Trophy Cupcakes for his birthday and to me that showed what a good person he is that his friends would go to that effort for him.

He was such a great guy, and I was having so much fun and I thought to myself “I really do want to date him”.

So we started spending more time together. We closed down a lot of coffee shops and restaurants because we would get to talking and hours would pass. He took things really slowly and I never felt pressured. I feel like with online dating there’s some unspoken rule that by the third or 4th date we should kiss and that made me nervous. I really liked that he wasn’t fast. We didn’t even kiss until the 7th time we hung out.

In January we decided to be exclusive and then soon after that he was at my house and said “Would you totally freak out if I told you I loved you?” I said “no” and he said “I love you” and that night I wrote in my journal “I think I love him.” I told him the very next day.

What I love about being with J. is that it feels like a really mature relationship, like being with a real man. He’s completely present when he’s with me. He’s responsible and has his life together.

And it turns out he’s not reserved at all. He’s really funny and open. He enjoys being with me and he really loves me. I can feel it and his actions show it.

When I’m with him I feel like a happy kid, I’m goofy, I can be completely myself. I feel uplifted and lighthearted and joyful. I trust him completely and feel totally safe with him.

A few months before Soulmate School I wrote a paragraph of the kind of relationship I wanted. The relationship I’d love to have. Here’s some of what I wrote…

“…we honor our monogamous relationship with each other daily with love, trust, respect and communication. We always value spending time with one another and value our own time as well. Our times together are filled with joy and laughter. We lift each other up and are our best selves. Our union is perfectly selected by God. We wake and go to sleep thankful that we have each other.”

And now I have this relationship with J.!

 

Screen Shot 2014-04-29 at 8.00.31 PM  Michelle Wong is a  Lifestyle and Financial Freedom Strategist. You can visit her website at michellewwong.com

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How does Michelle’s story make you feel? I’d love to hear your comments!